Four months ago, I was thrown into the deep end of single motherhood with no life vest—just me, my baby, and a whole lot of uncertainty. One moment, I was navigating life as usual; the next, I was juggling bills, diaper changes, and late-night breakdowns (mine and the baby’s). It was chaos, it was exhausting, and it was nothing like I had imagined.
But amidst the sleepless nights and endless to-do lists, something incredible happened—I found my strength. I learned how to stretch a dollar until it begged for mercy, how to turn survival mode into a strategy, and most importantly, how to trust myself in ways I never had before. These past four months have been my toughest yet, but they’ve also been the most empowering.
1. Survival Mode Is Real – But It’s Not Forever
The first few weeks felt like I was running on fumes—like a sleep-deprived, emotionally drained zombie trying to keep a tiny human alive. Everything was urgent, overwhelming, and exhausting. But guess what? That phase doesn’t last forever. Slowly, I found my rhythm. I learned that not everything needs to be done today, and that asking for help doesn’t make me weak—it makes me smart.
How I Got Through Survival Mode:
- Prioritizing Needs Over Wants: In the beginning, I focused on what truly mattered—feeding my baby, getting rest whenever possible, and ensuring basic bills were covered. Everything else could wait.
- Creating A Routine (Even A Loose One): I started small—setting wake-up times, nap schedules, and meal plans. Even a little structure helped me feel more in control.
- Leaning On My Support System: I learned to accept help. Whether it was a friend dropping off a meal, a neighbor watching the baby for 30 minutes, or even just a kind text message—it all made a difference.
- Letting Go Of Perfection: I realized that some days, just surviving was enough. The house didn’t have to be spotless, the laundry could pile up a little, and my baby wouldn’t remember if dinner was takeout instead of homemade.
- Practicing Self-Compassion: I reminded myself that I was doing my best. I celebrate small wins, like getting through the day without breaking down, and forgave myself on the hard days.
Eventually, the fog lifted. The exhaustion wasn’t as crushing, the anxiety wasn’t as constant, and I started to feel like myself again—only stronger, wiser, and more resilient.
2. Budgeting Like A Boss Is Non-Negotiable
If there’s one skill single motherhood forces you to master, it’s budgeting. With only one income, every dollar has to have a job, and impulse spending becomes a thing of the past. I had to take control of my finances, cut back where I could, and find smart ways to stretch my money.
My Budgeting Hacks
- Tracking Every Penny: I started using budgeting apps like EveryDollar and YNAB to see exactly where my money was going. Spoiler: Those little coffee runs add up fast!
- The Envelope System: I divided my cash into envelopes labeled for groceries, bills, and extras. If an envelope was empty, spending stopped—simple but effective.
- Meal Planning Like A Pro: Instead of last-minute takeout, I planned meals in advance, batch-cooked, and bought in bulk. I also learned to love budget-friendly meals like rice and beans, pasta, and slow-cooker soups.
- Negotiating Bills: I called service providers to ask for discounts, switched to budget-friendly phone plans, and even negotiated my rent down by offering to sign a longer lease.
Side Hustles That Helped Me Stay Afloat
- Selling Unused Items: Baby clothes, furniture, and random household items turned into quick cash on Facebook Marketplace and eBay.
- Freelancing: I picked up small writing gigs and virtual assistant jobs on Upwork, earning money during my baby’s nap times.
- Online Surveys and Cashback Apps: Apps like InboxDollars and Survey Junkie helped me save money on things I was already buying, and I earned small amounts doing paid surveys.
- Childcare Swaps: Instead of paying for a babysitter, I traded childcare hours with another mom, saving me hundreds of dollars a month.
Budgeting as a single mom isn’t just about cutting back—it’s about making the most of what you have. Once I started treating my money like a tool rather than a source of stress, I felt more in control of my financial future.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by expenses, my Budget Worksheet can help you break things down into manageable steps—because every dollar should work for you, not against you.
Download our free printable because guessing where your money went never worked for anyone!
(By subscribing, you agree to our terms & conditions, privacy policy, and disclaimer.)
Need a deeper dive? Grab my Budgeting eBook, packed with practical tips to create a plan that fits your life and gives you the financial peace of mind you deserve.
Get the full Budgeting eBook here: Budgeting Bliss For Busy Moms
Because taking control of your finances is the first step to taking control of your future!
3. The Mom Guilt Is Loud – But I’m Louder
At first, I felt guilty about everything: working too much, not working enough, buying takeout, not cooking organic meals, missing bedtime stories—the list was endless. But I had to remind myself: I’m doing my best, and that’s enough. My child doesn’t need perfection—they need a happy, present mom. And sometimes, that means frozen pizza and an extra episode of cartoons while I take a breath.
How I Manage Mom Guilt:
- Reframing My Perspective: Instead of focusing on what I couldn’t do, I started appreciating what I was doing. Keeping my child fed, loved, and safe was more than enough.
- Quality Over Quantity: I made sure that even if time was limited, it was meaningful. Whether it was a five-minute cuddle or reading a bedtime story, I gave my child my full attention when I could.
- Letting Go Of Unrealistic Expectations: Social media made it seem like every mom was making organic baby food from scratch and planning elaborate sensory activities. I had to remind myself that my child doesn’t need Pinterest-worthy parenting—they just need me.
- Prioritizing Self-Care Without Guilt: I used to feel bad for taking time for myself, but I realized that a burnt-out mom isn’t a good mom. Whether it was a 10-minute walk, a cup of coffee in peace, or listening to a podcast, I found ways to recharge.
Side Hustles and Money-Saving Hacks That Helped Ease The Guilt
- Remote Work & Freelancing: Finding flexible gigs meant I could work from home and still be there for my child. Freelance writing, virtual assisting, and tutoring became my go-to income sources.
- Batch Cooking & Freezer Meals: Instead of feeling guilty for feeding my child takeout, I prepped meals in advance so I always had something homemade (and easy) on hand.
- Thrift Shopping & Hand-Me-Downs: Instead of stressing over expensive baby clothes and toys, I embraced thrift stores, Facebook groups, and swapping with other moms.
- Government & Community Resources: I found local food banks, parenting support groups, and childcare assistance programs that helped lighten my financial load.
Mom guilt never fully disappears, but I’ve learned to drown it out with self-compassion, smart money moves, and the knowledge that I’m doing my absolute best. And that? That’s more than enough.
4. My Time and Money Are Sacred – And I Guard Them Like A Dragon
Before, I’d stretch myself thin trying to be everything to everyone. Now? I prioritize like a CEO. If it doesn’t serve my child, my sanity, or my finances, it’s a hard pass. That means fewer social obligations, guilt-free boundaries, and learning to say “no” without an explanation. Time is my most valuable currency, and I spend it wisely—just like my money.
How I Protect My Time:
- Saying No Without Guilt: I stopped overcommitting to events, favors, and activities that drained me. If it didn’t serve my family or well-being, it was an easy “no.”
- Time-Blocking For Sanity: I scheduled everything—work, playtime, self-care, and even “do nothing” time. This helped me stay productive without feeling overwhelmed.
- Eliminating Time Wasters: Scrolling endlessly on social media? Gone. Long phone calls that didn’t serve me? Limited. I became intentional about how I spent my free moments.
- Automating & Delegating: I set up auto-pay for bills, used grocery delivery, and outsourced tasks when possible—because time saved is energy gained. A budgeting app like Simplifi by Quicken can also help track spending effortlessly, so you stay in control without the stress.
How I Protect My Money:
- Avoiding Lifestyle Inflation: Just because I started making a little more from my side hustles didn’t mean I increased my spending. I stuck to my budget and saved the extra.
- Setting Clear Financial Goals: Whether it was building an emergency fund or saving for a family trip, I gave every dollar a job before it even hit my account.
- Using The 24-Hour Rule: No impulse spending. If I wanted something non-essential, I’d wait 24 hours. Most of the time, I’d realize I didn’t actually need it.
- Maximizing Free & Low-Cost Activities: Instead of pricey entertainment, I took my kid to free museum days, library story hours, and parks—memories don’t have to be expensive.
Side Hustles That Helped Me Stay On Track
- Freelancing & Virtual Assistance: I took on small gigs that I could do after bedtime—proofreading, social media management, and online customer service.
- Printables & Digital Products: I created and sold budgeting templates, meal planners, and kids’ activity sheets on Etsy.
- Renting Out Unused Space: If you have an extra room, garage space, or parking spot, renting it out can bring in passive income.
- Cashback & Couponing: Apps like Honey, Rakuten, and Fetch helped me get money back on things I was already buying.
The biggest lesson? Every yes costs something—either time, energy, or money. And as a single mom, I guard all three like a dragon sitting on a pile of gold.
5. Side Hustles and Smart Investments Matter
One income isn’t always enough, so I got creative. I explored side hustles, freelance work, and passive income opportunities. From selling gently used baby items to taking on weekend projects, every extra dollar counts. I also started learning about investing—even if it’s just a little at a time—so my money works for me in the long run.
Side Hustles That Made A Difference
- Freelancing & Remote Work: I found work-from-home gigs like content writing, virtual assistance, and social media management, allowing me to earn money while staying with my child.
- Reselling & Flipping Items: I sold outgrown baby clothes, toys, and household items on Facebook Marketplace and Poshmark. Thrift flipping also became a small side hustle—buying quality secondhand items and reselling them for a profit.
- Tutoring & Online Courses: If you have expertise in a subject, online tutoring through platforms like VIPKid or Wyzant can be a great way to earn extra cash. I even considered creating my own mini online course.
- Printables & Digital Downloads: I designed budgeting planners and kids’ activity sheets and sold them on Etsy and Gumroad—making money without having to do extra work after the initial setup.
Investing In My Future – Even On A Tight Budget
- Starting Small With Micro-Investing: I started using Acorns, which automatically rounds up my purchases and invests the spare change into diversified portfolios. It made investing effortless—even on a tight budget. Watching those small amounts grow over time showed me that building wealth isn’t about having extra money; it’s about starting where you are.
- Opening A High-Yield Savings Account: Instead of letting my emergency fund sit in a regular savings account, I moved it to a high-yield savings account where it grew faster with better interest rates.
- Looking Into Roth IRAs & 401(k)s: Even though retirement felt far away, I started contributing whatever I could, knowing that future me would thank me later.
- Exploring Passive Income Options: Beyond side hustles, I researched ways to make money with minimal effort—whether through dividend stocks, renting out extra storage space, or launching a blog that could eventually bring in ad revenue.
The biggest takeaway? Money stress doesn’t go away overnight, but with small, smart moves, I can build a more secure future for myself and my child—one dollar at a time.
6. Support Comes From Unexpected Places
When I became a single mom, I assumed my closest friends and family would be my biggest support system. But reality hit hard—some people disappeared when things got tough, while others I barely knew stepped up in ways I never expected. I learned that building my village wasn’t just about blood relatives—it was about neighbors, co-workers, and even online communities of other single moms who just get it.
Where I Found My Support System:
- Other Single Moms: Nobody understands the struggle like another mom doing it solo. I found online groups, local meet-ups, and mom forums where I could vent, ask for advice, or just feel seen.
- Neighbors & Local Community Centers: A kind neighbor offering to watch my child for 30 minutes while I showered? Life-changing. I also discovered community centers offering free or low-cost childcare, parenting classes, and food assistance programs.
- Workplace Allies: I was hesitant to open up at work, but when I did, I found supportive co-workers who covered for me when I had last-minute childcare issues and even helped me find freelance gigs.
- Government & Nonprofit Resources: WIC, SNAP, and childcare assistance programs were lifesavers in my early months. There’s no shame in using resources meant to help single parents get back on their feet.
How I Learned To Accept Help (Without Guilt):
- Letting Go Of Pride: At first, I wanted to do everything alone, but I realized that asking for help wasn’t a sign of weakness—it was a strategy for survival.
- Giving Back When I Could: Support is a two-way street. When I got back on my feet, I paid it forward—babysitting for another struggling mom, sharing budgeting tips, or just being a listening ear.
- Setting Boundaries: Not all support is helpful. I learned to say no to toxic relationships and only accept help from those who truly had my and my child’s best interests at heart.
The biggest lesson? My “village” didn’t look the way I expected, but it turned out even better. I learned that support doesn’t always come from where you think—but when you find it, hold onto it tight.
7. Self-Care Isn’t A Luxury – It’s A Financial Lifeline
Before, I thought self-care was spa days and bubble baths. Now, I know it’s something much deeper—it’s eating a real meal, drinking water, and taking deep breaths when the day gets chaotic. More importantly, self-care is about protecting my mental, emotional, and financial well-being. Because when I take care of myself, I’m also taking care of my child.
What Self-Care Looks Like Now:
- Prioritizing Sleep (As Much As Possible): Running on empty makes everything harder—including making good financial decisions. I learned to sleep when my child sleeps, even if that means skipping dishes or laundry for a night.
- Meal Prepping & Eating Right: I used to skip meals because I was too busy, but that only made me feel worse. Now, I plan simple, nutritious meals ahead of time to avoid stress-eating (or overspending on last-minute takeout).
- Daily Check-Ins With Myself: I ask myself: Have I eaten? Drunk water? Take a breath? Some days, self-care is as simple as locking myself in the bathroom for five minutes of silence.
Financial Self-Care – Because Money Stress Is Real
- Building An Emergency Fund: Even putting away $5 a week adds up. Knowing I have a financial cushion helps me sleep better at night.
- Automating Bills & Savings: Less stress, fewer late fees, and no more worrying about missed payments. I set up automatic transfers for savings—even if it’s a small amount—so my future self is taken care of.
- Setting Boundaries With Money & Time: I stopped lending money I couldn’t afford to lose and cut back on draining social obligations. Every “yes” costs time or money—so I say “no” more often.
- Finding Free or Low-Cost Ways To Recharge: Instead of expensive self-care, I take long walks, read library books, do at-home workouts, or just sit outside with a cup of coffee.
The biggest lesson? Taking care of myself isn’t selfish—it’s survival. Because a burned-out, stressed-out mom isn’t good for anyone, especially my child. When I prioritize my well-being—including my financial health—I set both of us up for a stronger, more secure future.
8. I’m Stronger and Smarter Than I Ever Knew
If you had told me four months ago that I’d be handling all of this—alone—I wouldn’t have believed you. But here I am, doing the impossible every single day. I’ve learned that single motherhood isn’t about just surviving—it’s about thriving. And part of that is being financially savvy, planning for the future, and making smart money moves for myself and my child.
I’ve learned to be resourceful, resilient, and relentless. I’ve had days where I cried in the shower, nights where I stayed up worrying about bills, and moments where I questioned if I was enough. But I’ve also had days where I felt unstoppable, nights where I laughed with my child until my stomach hurt, and moments where I looked in the mirror and saw a woman who refused to give up.
I’ve learned to celebrate the little wins—getting through a tough week, saving a little extra money, or even just making it to bedtime with my sanity intact. I’ve learned that I am my own safety net, my own provider, and my child’s greatest source of love and stability.
To any new single mom reading this: You’ve got this. It’s hard, it’s messy, but it’s also filled with love, laughter, and moments that remind you why you keep going. You’re not alone, and you’re stronger—and financially wiser—than you think. Even on your worst days, you’re still showing up, and that’s what matters most.
One day, you’ll look back and see how far you’ve come. And when you do, you’ll realize—you were always strong enough to do this.
The Road Ahead: Resilient, Resourceful, and Ready
Single motherhood isn’t the path I planned, but it’s the one that’s shaping me into the strongest version of myself. Every challenge has pushed me to be more resourceful, financially savvy, and emotionally resilient. I’ve learned that independence isn’t about doing it all alone—it’s about knowing when to ask for help, when to push forward, and when to give myself grace. The late nights, the budgeting struggles, the overwhelming decisions—they’re all part of a journey that’s teaching me how to build a life that’s not just stable, but fulfilling.
To every single mom out there: You are more capable than you know, and your future is brighter than it seems right now. The financial stress, the exhaustion, the doubts—they won’t last forever. Keep making those small, smart moves. Keep believing in yourself. Because one day, you’ll look back and realize you didn’t just survive this chapter—you mastered it. And your strength? That’s the legacy you’re passing on to your child.
The Single Mom’s Secret Playbook: 3 Money Hacks No One Talks About
Since you made it to the end, here’s the real gold—three secret money moves that no one tells single moms, but they should! These aren’t your basic budgeting tips; these are game-changers that can help you save, earn, and thrive.
(1) The Hidden World Of Unclaimed Money
Did you know there could be money out there with your name on it? Most people don’t check unclaimed.org, where you can search for unclaimed tax refunds, forgotten deposits, and even lost paychecks. Another hidden gem? MissingMoney.com—a legit database where you can find unclaimed funds across multiple states. A few minutes of searching could bring unexpected cash your way!
(2) The Cash-Back Stacking Trick
Most people use one cashback app, but stacking them is where the magic happens. Before you shop, combine:
- Rakuten (for cashback on purchases)
- Ibotta (for grocery rebates)
- Capital One Shopping (for instant price comparisons & coupons)
- Fetch Rewards (for scanning receipts—yes, even for random purchases!)
By stacking these, you’re earning on every dollar spent—without changing your shopping habits.
(3) The “Invisible” Side Hustle That Pays In Your Sleep
Forget surveys—passive income is the real game-changer. One of the best-kept secrets? Selling printables on Etsy. From budget planners to kids’ coloring pages, you create it once and get paid forever.
Sites like Canva (free design tool) and Creative Market (to sell templates) can get you started with zero experience.
Another goldmine? Amazon KDP (Kindle Direct Publishing) — self-publish low-content books like journals and planners and let Amazon handle the rest.
These are just a few insider tricks that can put more money in your pocket without adding extra stress. Now, go make that money, mama!
Find this helpful? Share it on Pinterest, LinkedIn and Facebook for your dear ones. Also, Sign up for our newsletter! You’ll get articles like this (and so much more!) delivered straight to your inbox.
Did you take our Reader Survey? If not, it only takes 1 minute and you can take our survey here.
FAQs
Start by tracking every dollar coming in and going out. Use a simple budgeting app like EveryDollar or YNAB to categorize expenses. Prioritize essentials like housing, food, and childcare, and look for areas where you can cut costs—like meal prepping instead of takeout or switching to a more affordable phone plan.
Flexibility is key! Freelancing (writing, virtual assisting, tutoring), selling items on Facebook Marketplace, taking online surveys, babysitting swaps, or even renting out a spare room can bring in extra income without taking time away from your child.
Look into government assistance programs, local nonprofits, or employer benefits that offer childcare help. Consider joining a childcare swap with other moms, working opposite shifts with a trusted family member, or exploring part-time daycare options.
Remind yourself that providing for your child is an act of love. Quality time matters more than quantity, so focus on being fully present when you’re together. Let go of perfection—your child needs a happy, stable mom, not an overworked, guilt-ridden one.
You don’t need thousands to start—just $5 or $10 a month can grow over time. Look into micro-investing apps like Acorns or Stash, open a high-yield savings account, or start a 529 plan for your child’s education. Small, consistent steps lead to big financial wins.
